scruta

[Ferret looks at the Box on his table and begins a conversation with it. Unfortunately, one sided.]

Ferret

What are you?

Box

…

Ferret

You’re a box. I know, but… That’s how it is, isn’t it? I’ve lived here for how long and I’m still lured into all of this bullshit. I get boxes delivered in the middle of the night and I start talking to them.

Box

…

[Ferret paces away from the Box, then paces back.]

Ferret

Who could possibly want to send me a box?

Box

…

Ferret

God. I need a drink.

[Ferret goes to the refrigerator and finds he only has some soy milk, a couple of days past the expiration date. He sighs then takes it out pours it in a glass. He sips on it, eyeing the Box.]

Ferret

You thought I meant a real drink, didn’t you? I did too.

Box

…

Ferret

I don’t have any alcohol in my house. I’m a cheap drunk anyway. I’d rather be rational about this.

Box

…

Ferret

Soy milk is high in protein. That should be good.

Box

…

Ferret

What do you want from me?

Box

…

Ferret

You know, on the phone, the girl said you “were” Shanghai. You’re all that Shanghai is in a box, huh?

Box

…

Ferret

You’re a bunch of bullshit gift certificates, aren’t you?

Box

…

Ferret

Fine, I’ll deal with you tomorrow.

[Ferret slugs down the last of his soy milk, puts his glass in the sink and goes to bed, leaving Box in the darkness.]

So… I found a card on the ground for one of those Three Kingdoms card games the kids seem to be playing these days. I didn’t recognize the character on the card, so I thought I’d dig a bit deeper.

 

First of all, I was surprised to find out that this is supposed to be a man. He looks super girly. His name is Xun You, who was one of the head military strategists for Three Kingdoms‘ bad boy, Cao Cao. I suppose that he wasn’t really a fighter, per se, so looking feminine isn’t such a big deal. The inscription at the bottom of the card reads (originally in traditional characters, but I’ve switched the script to make my life easier):

知能过宁武   德可配颜渊

Knowledge surpassing Ning Wu, character on par with Yan Yuan

I guess these have something to do with playing the card game it goes with.

Now to the back!

There’s a bit about what we know about him historically, etc. Most of interest to me is bottom where there’s stats for his “military worth” (武力值), his “strategy worth” (谋略值) and his “overall worth” (综合值). He’s the best in terms of “strategy worth” (92/100) as you’d expect. Man, he really looks like a lady in this picture though, doesn’t he? He doesn’t always look like this though. Here he is in the old school 80s TV version of Three Kingdoms:

Rock out, Xun You.